FOX43tv.com

When I was 17 I was married for the first time and it was aweful. When I think back we both got married for the wrong reasons and by the time I was 23, I knew it was a mistake. And it ended badly in divorce.

As with many people I swore of marriage and set off to be a single parent for the next 7 years. It was actually fun for me, because I was creative and always managed to come up with the money we needed and with just my daughter and I we became great friends as she got older.

When I was 30, I met a man who made me feel as though, I might be ready to try being married again. We were only married for 4 months before he died. It wasnt a good marriage.. we fought a lot, and neither of us really had any skills for being married, nor did we have the patience.

That is when I KNEW, I should not be married. But his death caused a huge difference in me. Anger set in, An anger that eventually, I no longer even attempted to control. When I look back on this, I realized that my anger was a way of keeping anyone from aproaching me or getting to close. That way, I would not be hurt again and could claim that I didnt really want anyone near me anyway.

So, my 30's were, needless to say miserable. When I reached 40, I met a man who took my hand and took me church and showed unbelievable kindness and understanding.

After renewing my relationship with God, I finally was released ot the anger that had encompassed me for 10 years. The people who had always been around me, had stood by me through all this, could not believe the difference that this person had made in my life.

So, I did it again.. I actually got married again... And instantly it changed. We were both frustrated.. I still tell jokes about us thinking.. Hmmm Married.. Ahhhh, you meant EVERY day! The fact is that the original problem was still there. Neither of us had the skills or the patience to be married. With mutiple divorces and disfunctional families.. we had never seen a good example of what a marriage should look like.

But this time it was different. I was older, I was free from my old anger and I had a new resource... my church.

The church we attend holds an extensive line of classes, one is called Marriage on the Rock. It is a program based on the teachings of Jimmy Evans.. yeah the one from the television show..

From the first class, I was intrigued.. I wondered if this was just some kind of preachy thing or what... well it wasnt

IT really told you rules for being married... Things that Men and Women do that cause the trust level to be broken down and then the communications.I am not talking about infidelity here, I am talking about everyday things that hack away at a ralationship. It teaches how this partnership REALLY works. and teaches that fact that it is a partnership, no one better or over the other... It teaches of the outside forces that should never be allowed to interfere and even how to handle what you say versus what they hear....

IT absolutely changed my marriage.. I have NEVER been happier in my life and I feel like I understand and trust my husband .. and he me. We are truly a united force and it is working wonderfully.

So, if you feel as though you are not getting what it is you want out of your marriage.. dont get a divorce.. just yet.. You can actually purchase this program online. See if there is something you can do to change your marriage..

Because as you can see.. if you cant make it with your current spouse (barring abuse or addictions) there is a reason, and you wont be able to make it with the next one.. until you solve that reason. Solving that reason.. could be exactly what saves your marriage.

Searchingtoo's Blog

Marriage on the Rock

Searchingtoo

Write your comment below: Email me when a new comment is added to this entry

Username:
Password:
forgot password \| sign up